View Of Life

Today started amazingly with Lady R coming to say good morning. Its the first time I saw her since her trip home and it ws so nice to hold Lady R and to feel her close to me. Unfortunatly Lady R could not stay and had to go to work. There is so much thats happened that I want to tell her about. All good things.

I some how am worried about Lady R, I think things are going great, its moving at a steady pace and we dont see each other every day. I know she was very busy today and I was hoping to see lady R this evening even just for 5 minutes to tell her the good news thats eating inside of me.

Lady R and I spoke about alot of things this weekend via Email and I really hope that it did not scare Lady R,

I have been through so much in my life. Loosing people in my life, loosing people I love. Its because of my past that I am who I am, I think all of us can say that though.

I looked at my life this weekend, Spoke to Mr D and to Mr H about there experiances in Love seeing they alot older and Mr H is settled down already, He met his wife almost the same way I met Lady R and Mr H knew that this is it by the 3rd week they were seeing each other. I some how find myself feeling the same way. That this is the woman I am ment to be with, ment to care for no matter what. But I can not make Lady R's mind up for her its entirely up to her. I can onyl but wish and Pray that we are ment to be and that some one bigger has plans for us.

I realised this weekend that I am not afraid of settling down any more. I thought I was ready in the past, things happened and it put me off a commitment this big for a long time. After my ex I decided that enough is enough and I need to find myself and thats what I spent the past months doing. Doing things I want to do and becoming the guy I used to be.

I was hoing to see Lady R tonight but I got a very short email and since then no contact at all not even a text message. But I am very patient, I know how tuff it is to work late or to be overly busy at work that you just cant get the time.

On the work side I have been strugling with a email server and luckely today MR SB helped me out with the issue but I am still worried about the server. I dont think its very healthy.